Another Thanksgiving has come and gone. Just like that, guests from out of town are back where they came from. The restaurant settles in for another lull just before the other holidays really hit.
I understand Thanksgiving, but at the same time...I really don't.
Families throw extravagant feasts. Lavish, decorative orchestrated productions. After stuffing our pie-holes and saying grace, claiming our deep gratitude for everything we have, we what? We just as quickly jump in our vehicles and race off to the stores because of course Black Friday starts early-- and we buy all the shit we don't yet have in our lives already. And if we miss those sales?! Cyber Monday.
That's thanks alright.
As my mother and I'm sure her mother has always said if our plates weren't clean, "Finish. There are starving children in China." What we didn't eat became breakfast.
Well I'll be damned, there are starving families here, maybe so close as next door. Somewhere along the way, we have lost the meaning of holidays and have let materialistic belongings and the Hallmark-tackiness of it all serve as the backbone, the main reason for running the show.
I'M not entirely innocent either. I remember there being a time where I would think I was clever-- armed with a fat, black, felt-tipped, permanent marker, furiously scribbling deranged circles around items I wanted in catalogs, leaving it out on display where my mother would surely see it. The miracle would be if I didn't encircle or highlight half the items in the magazine. What are we teaching kids? I associated holidays with receiving. Screw giving. I wanted things. And now? Things don't matter. It's the time that I get to spend with my family and those important to me. The world was crazy to think that only one day should be designated (and should suffice) for giving thanks-- it should be everyday you open your eyes and realize how very lucky you are to have what you do.
Looking at myself now, I'm not sure what to think. I'm no Scrooge, but do I see myself in shades of green... with a sinister smile, turning my fingers around the tips of a mustache. A grinch?
Bitter much? No... Maybe only tired of seeing the same thing over again. Like a broken record repeating itself. Serving guests that need to be drunk to sit across the table from in-laws. Running martinis for women reminiscent of Sex in the City whom have never worked a day in their lives, yet pass gift bags from spas and boutiques around the table. Hauling heavy fur coats to the back to be hung because their haughty owner wouldn't make the trip themselves, and instead hurled the garment at you. Silly me, I keep forgetting servers are the help. It's hell. This month, I will be praying for patience. Something that cannot be bought.
I hold my breath. Count back from ten. Exhale.
I've never been very good at saying thank you. I've never had much to give when it comes to giving gifts. Thankfully, it's actions that speak louder than words.
So give back with your actions. Show appreciation. Show love.
Be present. That alone is what the holidays should be about.
Thanks...(really)
Malia Etienette
Photo Credit:
"Thanksgiving in the US"- www.timeanddate.com
"Amazon's Naughty, Walmart's Nice?"- www.forbes.com
"Average Child's Christmas List"- www.72point.com
Grinch- www.bristolrising.com
"Carolina Charm: Operation Sandwich"- www.northcarolinacharm.com
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